Every step that I take and every move that I make Allah is watching me. My time is ticking turn to Allah before I return to him ♡ ☼
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What is there to say? Everything is hard. Returning phone calls. Not choking when I try to speak. Getting out of bed. What is there to do? I put foot in front of foot and trust that I will not wobble enough to give myself away. Pour concrete into my mouth to have an excuse for struggling with answering questions. Stare at the window. Look at hills and think of five years from now, of eventual sleep, of digging a hole and jumping inside. I train myself to half-listen when others speak and still hear the noise in my chest. I nod appropriately. What else is there? Get up. Go. Go. Go. Pause. Go. Accelerate. Go. Go go go. No stop. No exit. No time to reflect. Just experience after experience, and then the shaky seconds spent recovering from them. Pouring black coffee into wounds. Getting your feelings hurt over people who are not thinking of you in that way, have never thought of you in that way. Wasting time playing the game, the same game, hoping it will work this time around. I have put all of my effort into things that never wanted me back, in hopes that I could change the outcome. How else can I communicate this? I do not want to try anything, with anyone, anymore.

Anything Anyone Anymore, Lora Mathis (via lora-mathis)

(via callingtopeace)

memmoree:

In Arabic if you love someone, they are not always dears and beloveds, they are not always others, they are your eyes, your life, your spirit.

(via callingtopeace)

You need to be content with small steps. That’s all life is. Small steps that you take every day so when you look back down the road it all adds up and you know you covered some distance. It took me a long time to accept that, but it’s true. You need to have patience.
If you don’t deal with your demons, they will deal with you, and it’s gonna hurt.

— Nikki Sixx  (via her0inchic)

(Source: aflairfor-thedramatic, via callingtopeace)

casfallen:

Writing in my brain: Beautiful flowing sentences full of powerful phrases and enigmatically witty dialogue. 

Writing on the page: They did the thing and said some stuff. There was snark. 

(via callingtopeace)

… and the more hurt she gets, the more venomous she grows.

— Emily Brontë, Wuthering Heights (via lastisle)

(Source: valyrianswords, via callingtopeace)